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We had another Bearracuda Portland party on Saturday night and it was crazy fun. Over 400 hot dudes showed up and shook their asses. Each party is getting friskier and friskier. The next one will be on March 13th.

If you want to hear my set from the party the other night, I have posted it. Just click this link if you want the set separated into individual tracks. Your computer will magically download a .zip file. Just unzip it and drag it into iTunes.

If you would prefer to have it as 3 big chunks (one for each set I played), just click on this link. Again, a .zip file will be downloaded, which you will unzip and drag into iTunes.

I hope you enjoy the music.

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I obviously haven't had much to blog about. I'm much more into Twitter and Facebook these days, so I'll repeat a couple of my favorite little bits from the past few months.

The first was originally written in a message to my friend Dana, and then I was so proud of it I decided to tweet it. "When we were kids we were making out for some reason and her mouth tasted so bad I made her brush her teeth."

This next one came to me at 3 AM in Fort Lauderdale. "If I could have anything for Xmas, I would wish for enough food for all of the starving people in the world. Then I'd eat it in front of them."

And on a serious note, this one got quite a lot of response and a few people reposted it and stuff. "This is for all of you who have been posting the "God I pray for a cure for cancer" thing: Maybe you should pray that conservative right-wing Christians would stop interfering with and preventing stem cell research. Maybe then we could actually find a cure for cancer. Prayer will never cure cancer. Science will."

And then a little bit later I wrote, "To anyone out there who thinks I "have" to respect their religious beliefs... No the fuck I don't. I don't respect when schizophrenics believe in things that aren't really there either. To borrow an idea from the Bible, I love the believer but hate the belief."

Sometimes I'm clever.

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I might have H1N1. I have a fever, chills, sweats, cough, sore throat, sour tummy, fatigue, aches and pains etc. I have a doctor's appointment in a little while to see what's wrong. I had to call out sick in the middle of a trip because of it. The way I feel is very similar to how I felt when I was going through heroin withdrawal. It's not at all pleasant. My flight from San Francisco to Portland last night was brutal. I was in a lot of pain and had to sit in a middle seat next to 2 guys who were not at all interested in being considerate with the available space. I am now quarantined in the basement until I get better.

This is what I get for talking shit. When H1N1 made it's debut I joked that I hoped I would get it so I would be on the cutting edge. Now that H1N1 is passé I didn't want it anymore. We'll see what the doctor says. I had a regular flu shot this year, but I didn't get the H1N1 vaccine. I just had a cold a couple of weeks ago, too.

At least I'll lose some weight.

UPDATE: It's not H1N1. It's some other unknown virus.

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Smell them titties, gurl.

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I was flying Southwest on my commute to work. My boarding number was in the high B numbers, so I figured I would have a middle seat. That's fine. Since I'm flying standby, beggars can't be choosers. Imagine my surprise when I found an open window seat with the middle seat next to it also unoccupied. Feeling lucky, I sat down and started to read my book.

I'm currently reading Lies My Teacher Told Me: Everything Your American History Textbook Got Wrong by James W. Loewen. My flight was from from Portland to Oakland, and I was feeling less lucky and slightly pissed off because of the baby that was kicking the back of my seat. That baby wasn't even 1% as annoying as the woman who boarded the plane last and decided to sit in the seat next to me.

The guy on the aisle was reading his magazine while the plane was boarding. This woman came up to him and interrupted him, asking him to put her carryon in the overhead. I'm a firm believer in the "don't pack it if you can't lift it" concept of carryon luggage, but he was nice enough to get up and put her bag away for her. She then said that she was going to take the middle seat in our row because there was nothing else. Except that there were a bunch of other open seats on the plane. Whatever, I'm flying for free so who am I to complain.

She sat down and immediately started asking him all sorts of questions. He's tall, does he play sports? Hockey? Her son plays hockey. Where does he play? Oh, she's never heard of that town. The whole time he was trying to get back to his magazine. Finally he put on his earphones and she left him alone.

Then she swung her head my way and started reading my book. This is one of my very biggest pet peeves. As if that wasn't bad enough, she interrupted my reading to ask me to hold my book in a better position for her to read along with me. I told her no, that I was trying to enjoy my book in peace and quiet. She started arguing that she wanted to enlighten her mind as well and she was finding my book very interesting. I told her sorry, but I didn't bring my book for others to enjoy. She had a thick Eastern European or Russian accent and used it to tell me that she didn't know much about American history and was finding the book fascinating, so could I please share it with her. Again, I told her no and that if she found it so interesting, she should go buy it. I continued reading.

But she continued reading along. When she got to the right-hand page, she started huffing and puffing and fidgeting because she was having trouble seeing it. The she said "But I'm so bored. Please let me read along." I told her to read her own book. She said that she didn't bring one, then said that it was boring and she was enjoying mine better. I was utterly annoyed with this woman at this point and told her that she was being incredibly rude. She explained that "In her culture it is not rude."

At this point the guy on the aisle who had put her bag away for her got up to get a flight attendant.

"Well in America it is considered rude to read over someone's shoulder, and since you are currently immersed in American culture, you should act accordingly," I responded.

Her retort? "I'm not reading over your shoulder. I'm sitting next to you."

She saw my name tag and asked how Southwest would feel about me treating passengers that way. I told her that I didn't work for Southwest so I really couldn't give a fuck what they would think. She then saw my company's insignia and asked how THEY would feel if she sent a letter.

"Go ahead and write them a letter and tell them that you were rudely reading over my shoulder and when I asked you politely to stop, you pressed the issue and insisted that I let you. Go ahead. I'll help you with your spelling."

I stood up and said that I was going to change my seat because she had made me utterly unable to enjoy reading my book in peace and quiet. I started to crawl over her legs to get to the aisle. She said, "No, I'll get up, I'll get up."

"We're past the point of being polite, lady." I got up and moved my seat. Everyone in the immediate area who had witnessed this exchange was utterly flabbergasted. The guy on the aisle also started searching for another seat.

Even if it wasn't considered rude in her culture, once I told her that I didn't want her reading over my shoulder, that should have been it. She should have stopped and left me alone, right? What the fuck is wrong with some people? When your obnoxious behavior causes two other people to move their seats, wouldn't you know to settle down?

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I have posted my set from the recent Bearracuda Portland.

If you want all of the tracks separated, click here. Unzip the file and drag the tracks into iTunes. Make sure each track is tagged as part of a gapless album, which they should already be taken care of.

If you'd rather have the set as one long track, go here and right click on BearracudaPortlandOct.mp3 and save it to your computer.

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Facebook is becoming like MySpace in the amount of stupid shit people are wanting me to join or become a fan of.

Every time Facebook changes any little part of their design or functionality, 20 new groups start that are aimed at convincing them to change it back. I have never seen a group of people so afraid of change. They're always named "1,000,000 people to change back Facebook" or "5,000,000 people want the old Facebook," etc. Has a Facebook group ever resulted in Facebook changing anything back to a previous design? I, for one, don't mind the changes. Most of the time I find that my Facebook experience is better after they tweak something.

Do I need to be a fan of your bath and home store that I've never heard of or completed a transaction with? And after I have ignored your request for me to become a fan of your bath and home store 6 or 7 times, you would think that perhaps I wasn't interested in becoming a Facebook Fan of your bath and home store. And if you figured out that I wasn't interested in becoming a Facebook Fan of your store, you would probably stop sending me requests to become a Facebook Fan of your store. But no, I have to ignore your request once or twice a week because there is no way to just block you from sending me these requests.

If you're throwing a party in a location that I'm likely to attend, send your invite my way. Portland, Seattle, San Francisco, Vancouver? Sure. I'll consider it. Targeted invites are always welcome. If we know each other pretty well and you have something going on in NYC that is especially important to you, send an invite. I do travel to NYC quite a bit and I might be able to make it. When it's obvious that you just sent the invite to absolutely every last person on your friends list without any regard to location or likeliness to attend, it's pretty annoying.

I left MySpace because it was all shitty indie bands and shittier rap labels wanting to market themselves. Facebook is quickly becoming the new place for SPAM. If you want to promote yourself, post something on your page. Write a status update. Stop being so aggressive about it. That's not what I'm on Facebook for.

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Eddie Izzard is on my flight. We're going to spend 5 hours together. I'll try not to make an ass of myself.

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I have been 100% clean and sober for 2 years.

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